It's weird to be sitting in my empty house after two months of seeing the world. The first 3 days I was back I was so happy for large showers, lanes in the road, and American coffee that I didn't really miss what I had just left, but as I was putting together the Master slide show for the family yesterday I began to miss what I'd left behind. I always thought I appreciated this opportunity as it was happening, but I didn't realize how much more I would appreciate it when it was over. And honestly, I never expected to be as nostalgic for new cultures, different languages, adventure, anchovies, and inconvenience as I am now. I told myself over and over during the trip "You can always go back" and I think that's the best way to keep things in perspective. Barring some crazy catastrophe, Europe isn't going anywhere. Neither is South America. Or Asia. Or New Zealand. Or any of the other places I am now doubly motivated to see. And it's not like I'm coming back to a terrible life. I love the Bay Area. I love Silicon Valley and its ambitious and successful inhabitants. I love my pets and my friends and my family. I am extremely excited to tackle a new project, and after spending the last two months writing, taking pictures, speaking languages, and being involved in the world, I am excited to make that a regular part of my life, whether through my career or side projects. I love that right now the possibilities are endless. I don't know if I would ever take a two month long trip again without some special purpose for doing so, but I am SO glad that I made it a priority to do it now. I do feel like a changed person. I know now without a doubt that I can set goals and accomplish them, and that I can make things happen for myself, which is something I doubted for awhile. Overall, I feel way less anxious about my presence in the world, less pressed to fit into some mold, and more confident that I can handle any situation I am thrown into. I had to work within a variety of cultures, deal with setbacks, and be creative when it comes to problem solving, and not only did I succeed in doing it, but I enjoyed it. I was free to follow my instincts and I discovered that they rarely steered me wrong. I feel incredibly empowered, self-reliant and capable. And all of that feels really good. So where do I go from here? I was shocked to remember that I am getting married in 9 months and that I was coming home to a life of being unemployed so those are the next two big hurdles to jump over. I want to become re-fluent in Spanish, and I want to find a way to continue writing - I really enjoyed this most recent "project" and am hoping to find something equally interesting to write about. Thanks SO MUCH to everyone who read my blog, it made me feel much less homesick knowing that people from home gave a crap about what I was up to. Even during the rough spots, I always felt like I had someone to talk to and a purpose for traveling. My biggest hope is that this story inspired you to take your own trip - and if you do, I want to hear all about it. Till next time -Alex
