And I can not believe how mood-swingy I've become regarding this trip. It's almost like, I've waited so long to travel, built it up so much in my mind, read so many books on all the dream places I could go. . . now that I'm packing and so close to hitting the road, I go from extreme elation to paralysis. Last night I was lying in bed, and my dog came around the side and laid down on the ground next to me, and I thought 'I have two weeks left before I will miss this.' I started thinking of boarding the plane, and watching the ocean go by, and I started getting so nervous. I went to sleep wondering - why is it whenever I get the things I want, I suddenly start doubting their worth?

But then I smile so big when I see movies like Ricky Christina Barcelona, or read a particularly compelling description of the Cinque Terre, or hear about how easy it is to just take off on the train and go somewhere new. And I know that this sort of adventure is exactly what I want and need, and any fear I have is indication of how badly I need it. If you get to a point in your life when you're afraid to do the big things you've always wanted, that is exactly the moment you need to grab yourself by the hair and force yourself to do it.

Two.five weeks away . . . . .